Ang Pambansang Awit ng mga Kabit : Saving All my Love for You


I know...I know...you must all be wondering why the hell did I chose that as my subject. I am in a dillema. I came from a broken family, and i don't want to deal with that again. No more drama for me. And no offense meant sa mga KABIT or should i say 3rd party, or whatever you may call it,but I can say that this song suits the situation.

Now consider this a guilt trip,and I was surprised by my PA's comment on my latest report card, he just said "When can you learn", err what? I really didn't know what he meant by that. We never really had the chance to talk and I dont think my reputation of being who i am....well, who really am i? Can somebody tell me?...I am not certain of who I am anymore...

All I know is that I have a strong connection with someone right now. ...or perhaps,its one of those assumptions again.
Perhaps, I am not really learning, I become oblivious of the pain that I went through by being in a predicamant. I always fall,and I wish I fall head first,and then turn into a trance,and forget about everything.

I don't think this connection would work, I want to say goodbye to him. But everyday,he becomes my addiction. His voice lingers,his smile, his eyes and his kiss..please let me say goodbye and I just need to wait,for the person who will really sweep me off my feet.

I know that this is wrong, I know that I should stop,but everytime I think of him I just fall so deep. Not again?
Lets just say that I loved the intense connection, and I think what happened was a temporary lapse in my judgement.
I hate it. I hate the situation. I hate myself. I am completely insane. I really need to stop. Please ,can anybody help me?

I don't want to dwell with this feeling, I dont want to be the reason of something really haunting me in my future years.
Maybe Im stupid, I am bitching again , and being human is a reason that has been long overused,much like experience...

I will think of it as a dream,when I wake up tomorrow,I know he will no longer be there. The borrowed time will be logged into my yesterday, I will keep it hidden,locked and I will try to forget..what seemed to be so real. Overwhelming,Intoxicating,I got twisted. I cant help it. But I need to burry it,deep and then in the future,I will remember,that for once in my life, I had him,right beside me. Right where I wanted.

And once again, I still get what I want,but just temporary. And I know that it would be another disaster, I will then hurt myself, my bruised ego and my tattered pride will be left shattered. I need a newstart,I need diversion, I need to say NO to temptations...I need not give in.

"A few stolen moments is all that I have---although I try to resist being last on your list---" (sigh) these lines are really sumthin..sniff sniff..no offense meant to some or to people who loves this song. I am just making a statement and its how i the song strucked me.